I was never athletic, hated the gym.
Then I got married to a man who was a faithful gym goer. He also was generally active and I wanted to be able to join him. Then I got pregnant and gained 100 lbs. I thought I was supposed to eat for 2 adults.
After my first child was born, we wanted to have a big wedding because we had a small official one when I was 8.5 months pregnant. That meant I had 1 year to loose all 100 lbs.
I lost all 100 lbs in 8 mos.. I did it with lots of cardio, and an Atkins like diet.
So I started to see what I was capable of.
I then got very sick with mystery illness and dropped down another 30 lbs.
I was a size 4 and maintained that for 8 years. I wasn't able to eat much. Potatoes, veggies and butter. With a small bit of met here and there.
I then decided to pursue weightlifting and a trainer. I had a dream if being try fit. Not just skinny fat. Once again I shocked myself by what I was capable of.
But then she switched me to a low carb diet again and this was around 2.5 years ago. I again became very sick. I ended up depressed and bedridden for 2 years. I gained 40 lbs during this time. I started to recover again January 2014 and now I'm back at it.
But recently I was formally diagnosed (at a hospital via blood test) with multiple food allergies to things that SHOULD be quite healthy. This has presented me again with some challenges and roadblocks. However, I am practicing new ways of eating and obtaining my macros.
I have a dream of being in the best shape of my life by 40 and maintaining that. I have struggled with severe depression because of physical challenges. I am trying to retrain my thought life and actions to regain my joy and grit for the journey.
Because I no longer just want to be flabby and skinny. I love the definition and endurance I develop. Skinny doesn't equal healthy. Plus while I was a size 4 I felt horrible. I am not really built to be a size 4. To get there I had to live on 400-800 calories a day. And that's not enough to live on. I don't need to die of malnutrition.
Muscle is sexy. And I can eat more when I have muscle that requires the calories.