Years ago i have been diagnosed with chronic depression, emotionally instable personality disorder and an eating disorder.
At that time i was having binges every day as i never developed a healty eating pattern and ran up to 10k every day, but as u might can gues i didn't feel or look like i wanted to.
I had several kinds of health treatments but none of them really worked quick enough so i gave up on them before even really trying.
When i was 19 and attempted to get my school done my depression went heavier so i got on anti-depressants which led me right into anorexia nervosa.
I pushed myself extremely hard, i graduated as the best of that year and third best of all time and went down to a size 0, all in one school year (which is approx 9 months or so)
But right after, i totally broke down again and even reached for alcohol and other drugs to numb my mind.
Gladly some part of me was strong enough to seek for a way out, which was a 4 month stay at a hospital.
At that time i found out about jillian michaels and shaun t, so at the days i felt strong enough i started working out with their videos and got into vegan lifestyle.
As someone who was always interested in meds and psychology, i read several books about my issues and health related themes and got my Tumblr account.
I felt a lot better, came back to a size 4 again and started another attempt to live a "normal life"
Well, it was...okay. for a while.
Then, December 2013, i got down into a major depressive episode again.
I spent my days laying around scrolling through tumblr and one day i stumbled over a picture of Alexandra Bring.
I was stunned and went to the conclusion that i don't want to feel weak anymore.
I indulged myself into researches, started a long-term therapy and new meds to help my brain.
At that time i started crossfit aswell.
It was the one activity that really got me feeling good and positive, but i was still feeling quite weak.
That was when one of them suggested to add bodybuilding.com to my list of favourite research pages and finally led into me wanting to transform myself completely
How i got back to working out:
i was diagnosed with a brain tumor in 2015 which let to a series of really exhausting episodes of headache, complete fatigue and sleeping way too much.
May 2015 i decided to get it removed, thanks to lots of bad luck i had to get three more surgeries and heavy medication until November 2015 which just crushed my whole body.
After standing up and falling down a few times i managed to start training regularly and come back to my beloved fitfam in the end of 2016