Happy Toni Tuesday
OVERALL RATING
Happy Toni Tuesday my sexy beasts. Post competition has its own set of challenges. From reverse dieting and cardio to a slight depression knowing something you have put your whole heart and life into has come to an end. I'm gonna be vulnerable here because someone out there needs to read this. My time on stage was less than what I had hoped for. I have had a very difficult year so far with many personal issues that have made prep time even more challenging. But the lessons I have taken away from this whole experience are priceless to me. It's easy to act right and be positive when we get our way, take 1st place what have you. On the national stage I have never felt so invisible. I took last in my class and I have never experienced something like that in this sport. EVER. It stung for the moment on stage and then I remember so clearly how I really saw myself and judged myself. I was proud that I brought the best me to that stage. I had hopes to do better but in the big spectrum of everything, being in that moment where I didn't beat the living **** out of myself was monumental. How we react outwardly as well as inwardly speaks volumes as to where we really are in life. I couldn't be more proud of where I placed and how I did this year. So for anyone defining their worth based on a placing, it's such a tragedy. The trophy will get dusty. Self worth and value to me is so much more important. I will get my pro card one day. With the lessons learned this year, I will come back with a vengeance and get what I know matters to me. Be gentle with you. Have an amazing day!