When I was a kid and teen, I was excessively physical. I got Osgood-Schlatter's (pretty big calcium deposits underneath my kneecaps) from over activity while growing up. Point being, I was very physical. Football, wrestling in middle and high school. Well. I got hooked on drugs when I was 15, and that all started to change. My life became about drugs.

Forward to adulthood, I never paid attention to my body. When I was 17, I got hooked on cocaine hard. I wouldn't eat for days. I dropped from 136 to 95 pounds. I gained the weight back after getting off, but I also added something I'd never had before. ****ing stomach fat. Not a lot. Just a pouch. But it was a tremendous amount of fat, for me. My body remembered I was starving it, so since then, I have no longer had a perfectly flat stomach. That's part of it. I want to get back my flat stomach that was rightfully mine!

But. More recently. This past year I had been bedridden. I was 140 pounds, and dropped down to 119 from inactivity. So, I just started working out lightly. Some curls, going for walks, and stuff, just to get back in relative shape. But the iron called to me, and I started getting more and more into it.

My little brother has been lifting lightly and gained a bit of weight. He was never stronger than me before. D: He is now, by a lot. Like twice as strong. [Update: I'm now stronger than him, even though we've been working out together every time, and I weigh 143, and he weighs 180.] So last month I asked him if he wanted to work out with me. Then it just became this thing we do every week. That helps tremendously, because it's not just me that I'm working out for: I'm also helping him. It's great to work out with someone else, and it helps keep my resolve.

I love the nutrition aspect, and the recovery aspect. I enjoy being sore, though that's not my goal. I know it doesn't mean you had a good workout, but it damn sure feels good, because it feels like you succeeded.

I enjoy being sore and structuring my diet to attempt to solve that problem. I also just enjoy the idea that I'm building my body. Putting on muscle. I've always been a very skinny guy. Well. I want to change that. Also, I want to look more intimidating, so people don't **** with me or are less apt to want to. I don't want to intimidate people. I just want my outside to reflect my inside, so that troublesome people can also see that and at least make them more hesitant about starting shit. Perhaps my issue has often been that I am too kind to people. I show respect. And people mistake that kindness for weakness, which is definitely isn't. Maybe that's naive, but hey. Another motivation is good.

[Update:] And, I've been getting more attention from women, so, that's a plus.