Last Visit: Aug 28, 2008 9:56am Last Forum Post: Jul 9, 2007 2:03pm Last Photo Upload:Never Last Profile Update: Aug 28, 2008 9:55am Last Blog Post: Mar 30, 2008 10:23am
"TO COMPLETELY TRANSFORM MY INNER AND OUTER SELF!!!
To acquire inner strength and self-confidence by knowing that I gave my personal transformation 110% each and everyday. To Be Toned, Fit and a Size 2 By December 2008!!!"
I hit rock bottom....physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. On May 15th, 2007 I was contemplating suicide and an old friend called me up and declared that that was the day we were finally going to start the gym and begin morning workouts together. She wanted to tone up and I have alot of weight to lose so she thought it would be good for both of us. She also knew what events had just transpired in my life recently and I guess she had an "idea" of my vulnerable mental state-and figured this would distract me from thinking about the fact that my 4-year relationship had come to an abrupt end because that person left me for someone they met online........I started working out the next morning and have been consistant with it ever since, in fact, I'm hooked. The same day I started working out at the gym I also quit smoking!!
A week later, beings that I had "survived" my 1st week of working out, I made a decision to take this to the next level and go all the way. I hired a personal trainer @ the gym, totally changed the way I eat, started taking supplements, drink only water (lots of it) and track EVERYTHING i do......Since then i have done a 360 and have given up all prescription and non-prescription medications. I am studying Alternative Medicine and healing while constantly elevating my state of mind and health each and everyday :)
Why I Love It:
I love the feeling I have after a workout.....especially a "good" workout! I have a new outlet to channel all this pent up energy inside of me. Instead of running for food now I just run to the gym! lol I also love the fact that Bodybuilding is something that benefits YOU and YOU only!! You work your tail off but in the end it's all worth it........The feeling of spiritual renewal i get after a workout has no words that can describe the feeling :)
How I Stay Motivated:
VISUALIZATION:
There were many, many times throughout my life that someone just felt that it was ok to put me down because of my weight. I've been called names ever since I was in the 3rd grade up until now. The time periods in my life where I was thin it was like people shut the #%^$ up!!! Yeah, I want people to shut up and admire my body again!! Only this time around I will look even better and stronger..... "Yeah, playa hatas!!"
I remember what I looked like 7 years ago before I got fat. I was a size 2 105lbs!! I even tried out for the "Miami Heat's Dance Team!!"
I ENVISION myself in my old black thong bikini laying topless on South Beach, lol
SUPPORT SYSTEM:
There are a few people in my life right now who I know have my best interest at heart and knowing that motivates me to make them proud one day, but of course ultimatley it matters that I am proud of me!!
INFORMATION:
Knowledge is power and the more I read up the more confident I get. Of course BODYBUILDING.COM is to me the BEST source of information and support all wrapped up into one! Fitness Magazines, Videos, Live Fitness/Bodybuilding shows, ect. Being consistantly exposed to this lifestyle will "train" your mind and before you know it, everything just becomes habit.
BOOKS:
The Eat-Clean Diet Tosca Reno
The 7 Habbits of Highly Effective People
BB Accomplishments:
I have a long way to go but I am proud of myself so far for making the decision to take control of my life and actually putting it to action.
So far I have been told that I lost weight and that I'm looking better but I'm shooting for the stars baby!!! ***I have dropped 2 sizes so far***
Forum Signature:
"How Would You Live If You Had No Fear At All?"
Last Updated: May 15, 2008 4:53pm
Progress Pictures
Dec 6, 1998
Nov 3, 2007
TAKEN ON DECEMBER 06th, 2006
This was me at my worst, I cried when I saw this photo!! (This is what Depression can do to you....not funny at all) 200+lbs (I actually took this picture because I was trying out for that tv reality show "The Biggest Loser" lol
Just a closeup of me on Nov 3rd, 2007 I will submit some new body shots as soon as i find someone to take them, lol i'm working hard to get ripped for April 2008 :)
TO COMPLETELY TRANSFORM MY INNER AND OUTER SELF!!!
To acquire inner strength and self-confidence by knowing that I gave my personal transformation 110% each and everyday. To Be Toned, Fit and a Size 2 By December 2008!!!
Goal (Long):
To conquer MY inner demons. You know, the ones we all have. Mine tell me that I'm not worthy of beauty, love, happiness & success. They keep me in a state of inerta where I'm too afraid to make any real changes in my life for fear of ridicule from others. Or they drive me to act on impulses causing me to lose self-control. I will acknowledge them but this time I will be the one in control!
To Break The Pattern Of Turning To Food In Times Of Crisis, Boredom, Emotional Stress, Depression, Anxiety, Ect....
To Spend My 30's A Fit, Sexy, Confident Woman Who Has No Regrets In Life!! Being Overweight For The Majority Of My 20's Has Taught Me That I Don't Want To Go Through That In My 30's!! lol
Although I have been "skinny" before, I never had a strong "core area" My stomach was never as tight as I would have liked it. Even in High School I looked great but I still had a layer of fat on my stomach. This has always been a problem area for me. My ultimate, ultimate goal is to not only be a size 2 but to have a rock hard solid stomach with NO FAT..........even sporting a six-pack!! lol
My boyfriend and I are feeling better (aside from my Candida, lol) and tonight we are doing all of our clean eating shopping and doing our "preliminary" tonight. I am so excited and happy that we were able to make it throught these tough times. I am mentally and spritually in a...
Hey, thanks for adding me to your friend list. I'm starting a modified version of the Body for Life program tomorrow and I am hoping for lots of success. Hopefully I will have some progress pictures up soon. Later.
Hey Jess! Just trying to touch base with everyone on my friends list. Hope all is well in your world and you have a great weekend. I'm making some big changes if ya get a chance stop by and check it out.
Ya..I know how all that other person bullsh -it can affect ya. Stress eater myself and slowely getting rhe food intake under control is hard!!(always workout so I could eat what I wanted when I wanted:(!) But others crud when you are ADHD and dyslexic can realy drive you!
Your face has definatly leaned out so I am shore the rest of you has also. You at least had a time when you has a skinny self..I always look like like a side of beef! At least you had abbs once. You can do it again!! Good luck! Love the goth look..I mis going to those clubs...
What's up Jess! Haven't touched base with ya in forever. I've just had an entire week of epic workouts and was thinking of blogging about it. Hope all is well in your world.
hey there girl it been long time how are you? How everything going? Been busy here working out working get ready for summer and all that. Take care hope to hear from you soon
Nobody trips over mountains. It is the small pebble that causes you to stumble. Pass all the pebbles in your path and you will find you have crossed the mountain.
Awww, get well soon. I just got over the crud. :( Was raring to get back to the gym and promptly pulled something in the middle of my back. D'OH! :) Niiice. I hope you're feeling 100% real quick!
